Your Love

Chapter Nine

Cordelia rubbed the antiseptic pad over one of the cuts Spike had inflicted on Angel’s handsome features. He winced and she smirked, her eyes twinkling. “Well it serves you right. I told you those two were going to cause nothing but trouble, but did you listen? And now I think I have the perfect right to say I told you so.”

Angel dropped his eyes to the floor. She was right. He should have dusted them both weeks ago. This was all his fault. He shouldn’t be so stupidly sentimental. “Thanks Cor.” Still she was supposed to be on his side.  

"Your welcome,” she replied brightly, ignoring the sarcasm. “Is now a good time to discuss my raise?”

Angel met her eyes once more, a frown marring his forehead. “Cordelia…”

“’Cause I was thinking that it would be a good way to stop this happening, you know, like, every time you go all Grrr, you give Wes and me a raise. Well me, at least. That way you might think before you…”

“Brutally torture and murder one of your friends?” Xander was nowhere near calming down.

“Gee Xander, why don’t you try getting a life before you start passing judgement on other people’s?”

“Well Cor, at least I don’t have to resort to working for the undead just so I can continue to dress in trashy hooker wear.”

“You’re doing it again,” Anya interrupted.

“Doing what?” Xander turned, mystified, to his girlfriend.

“Behaving as though all demons are the same. Angel and Angelus are two completely different entities who share the same body. Why does no-one remember that?” Anya defended.

“Here, here,” Beth concurred as she and Wesley entered the Bronze.

“Why are you taking his side?” Xander still couldn’t believe Anya was doing this.

“Does it matter? I’m right. And even if Angelus did do some pretty horrendous things, he was an evil, soulless demon. What did you expect? Now, you seem to take Riley’s side more often than not, and he’s a good guy remember, with a fully functioning soul and conscience. So why is he going to betray Buffy and try to kill her?” Anya was 100% serious. She really didn’t like Xander when he got like this.

Xander was quiet. There was nothing to say. She was right. His 1120-year-old girlfriend had taken one minute to explain what Buffy and Willow had been trying to teach him for four and a half years. He didn’t like vampires. He didn’t think he ever would. Vampires had taken one of his best friends. Had taken Jesse without even a goodbye. But it was time to move on. He couldn’t keep punishing them for something he had never had any control over. Bad things happened. Evil did good; good did evil. Angel was not Angelus; Spike and Beth had proved themselves here tonight. They were not all the same. He pulled Anya into his arms and hugged her. “I’m sorry,” he said quietly. Anya smiled.

****

Willow knelt on the stage next to the body of her former boyfriend praying. She was praying to the goddesses, who helped her in her spells; praying to the God she had believed in all her young life. Nothing seemed to be working, but she would not give up. Oz was breathing shallowly, but had had not regained full consciousness.  She wished rather ironically that he was here for her to talk to about this. Oz was her rock, her centre. He calmed her. She loved him. She always would.

Tara watched Willow from her position in front of the stage. She felt removed from the activities of the Slayerettes and was once again worried by the arrival of Willow’s former love. Tara smiled sadly. Willow needed to be happy. If she wanted Oz, then Tara wouldn’t stand in her way.

As if reading her thoughts, Willow turned her head to look at her girlfriend. She smiled as Tara looked shyly back at her, and motioned for her to join her on the stage. Tara ran up and sat opposite Willow, and they joined hands over Oz’s body. Their whispered words of supplication to the goddesses were finally heard, and Oz awoke.

“Willow?” He looked at the beautiful girl before him, and wondered how he had ever been able to leave her.

“Oz. You’re ok?” Willow’s smile lit up the whole room.

“Well, I hurt. But yeah.” He pushed himself up into a sitting position and stared at Willow. “Thanks.”

“No problem.” She stared back, sharing a special moment that only two people who had once been so in love could share. They broke eye contact at the same time; each realising that things had changed between them. They would always love each other, but they could not be together, no longer needing each other in that way.

Oz turned to Tara. “Thank you.”

“Uh… No, uh, no problem,” she said shyly as Oz smiled at her.

Willow reached over and took Tara’s hand, once again reassuring her that she was the one Willow wanted to be with. The two witches helped the werewolf to his feet, and the three moved to join the rest of the group.

****

Beth’s mobile phone began to ring, startling the 11 people seated within Giles’ small living room. Drusilla was tied to a chair next to Giles’ desk, much the same as Spike had been a year ago; Oz was resting on the couch, Willow seated next to him, holding desperately onto his hand, while Tara crouched beside them on the floor. Xander sat in the armchair by the window, Anya perched happily on his knee, while Giles sat opposite in the hard wooden chair, pouring various cups of tea and coffee, combined with copious amounts of alcohol. Angel, Cordy, Wesley and Beth were sat next to the stairs, Cordelia complaining every now and then about uncomfortable furniture and the need for Watcher’s to have larger homes, just for occasions such as this.

Beth felt a huge weight lifted from her shoulders when she heard her brother’s voice.

“Spike where are you?”

The other 10 individuals stared at her, all desperate for news of Buffy.

“Where?! The hospital?” Beth shot a pained glance at Giles as he jumped from his chair and hurriedly put on his coat. Willow and Xander were already at the door when she spoke again.

“Yes… No, that’s ok, I’ll tell them… Home… No that’s fine my darling. See you later.” Beth put the phone away and turned to the others waiting by the door. “Buffy’s fine. Spike’s taking her home to rest. He said he didn’t think anyone should go see her ‘til tomorrow.”

As Willow and Xander opened their mouths to protest, Beth continued, her gaze moving to rest on Angel.

“The other Slayer… Riley killed her.”

The room was silent as the information that Faith was dead sunk in.

Xander was in shock. Faith. The first woman he had ever… Dead. Faith. Dead.

Willow began to cry, silent tears pouring down her cheeks. “No, no, no,” she repeated quietly over and over. Faith couldn’t be dead.

Giles pulled Willow gently into his arms to comfort her as she wept, the news hitting him like a blow to the head. “Oh, Faith. Rest peacefully,” he murmured.

Wesley couldn’t move. He couldn’t feel his limbs. His Slayer. The one who had tied him up and tortured him. She was dead, gone. He shook his head, refusing to believe that beautiful, vibrant Faith was no longer there.

Cordy stared at Beth. “Dead?” she asked harshly. “She can’t be dead. Not Faith. She’s a survivor, she can’t die, Wesley tell her. Angel…” Wesley hugged Cordelia to him, as she started to shake.

Angel stared blankly at the floor. Faith. His Faith. She was dead. Pain coursed through him. He had never felt this bad, not since he had left Buffy a year and a half ago. After all he’d done to her as Angelus, he’d never be able to apologize. He squeezed his eyes shut tightly. She’d said she loved him. He’d never be able to say it back.

****

Spike opened the door to the Summers’ house and guided Buffy softly through into the kitchen. She sat down at the counter blindly when he told her, her brain acting automatically, unable to take anything in. He moved through the kitchen cupboards with the familiarity of a man who’d spent three weeks watching the woman the he loved from a distance and exploring her house when she was unavailable to gaze upon.

He remembered the last time he had sat in this kitchen as a guest. Joyce had made him hot chocolate with little marshmallows. They were in this cupboard if he remembered rightly. Spike made the beverage in silence, glancing at Buffy in concern every couple of minutes. She hadn’t said a word since Faith had died.            

He placed the steaming cup of chocolate down in front of her as he sat down next to her. He removed his coat and laid it carefully over the counter, then began to quietly drink from his own mug. He didn’t need to say anything; knew she wouldn’t thank him for meaningless platitudes. He was quite happy just to sit here next to her and wait. She needed looking after. He smiled down into his cup. He sounded old. ‘You are old, moron,’ his mind called and he started to chuckle.

Buffy looked up at Spike, startled that he was quietly laughing to himself. She couldn’t see that there was anything funny about this night’s events. “Happy are you? Another Slayer dead, so lets all have a party?” Buffy was angry. Not just with Spike, but also with herself, with Riley, with Drusilla. Faith was dead, and they had all contributed. She started to hit him, needing to lash out, knowing he wouldn’t back away.

Her small, strong fists, hit his shoulders and chest as he turned to face her. He took every one without comment, and rejoiced in each of them. Buffy was a fighter. She’d never let this beat her; never let anything beat her. When she seemed to tire, he pulled her to him again, cradling her as he’d longed to do for three months. ‘Years!’ his demon clarified. She sobbed into his chest, her tears soaking his black t-shirt and red silk shirt. He whispered inanities into her hair, trying to soothe her.

When she finally calmed she stayed within the confines of his arms, feeling safe and protected. She turned her head up slightly to look at him and he swore his heart started to pound. “I’m not happy love. Slayer or not, I’m sorry about your friend.” His voice sounded strange to his own ears and he wondered if she could tell what she was doing to him.

She smiled slightly in a silent thank you, and closed her eyes. As her breathing became steady, Spike lifted her gently in his arms and carried her upstairs to her bedroom. As he placed her tenderly on the bed he grinned as his mind went over all the possible ways he had considered being in this room with Buffy. Not one of them involved him pulling the cover over her fully clothed form, pulling the blinds so that she wouldn’t wake to find a pile of ash at the side of her bed, and sitting quietly beside her in the wicker chair watching her sleep.

****

Faith couldn’t see anything. Then she could see light. White light all around her. She felt like she was floating. She turned around trying to find something to focus on, but she was alone. There was nothing. Then there was something. A person, a man walking slowly towards her.

“Faith,” he greeted as he drew near. “Welcome.”

“Welcome, where?” Faith questioned. “Is this heaven? Doesn’t look like hell.”

“You suffered enough for any wrongdoing you may have done in past,” the man told her. “But your destiny is not to end here. Your life is entwined with two others. There are things left for you to do.”

“So, what, I’m sent back to Earth to do three good deeds before they open the pearly gates for me?”

“Not quite. You are dead Faith. None of us can change that. But your destiny is not to die.”

“My destiny?” This conversation was becoming stranger by the minute. “My destiny was Vampire Slayer, pal. Destiny’s done.”

“That is not so Faith. Buffy Summers is the Vampire Slayer, neither you nor Kendra were meant to be called.”

“Hey, it wasn’t my fault B died, ok. You go talk to your people if that’s what’s rattlin’ your chains.”

“When Kendra died, we realised this was not her destiny. You have been chosen.”

“Again? Can I ask, when you’ve got the whole world to choose from, why do you keep coming back to me?”

“It’s your destiny.”

“Enough with the destiny crap ok. Just tell me what I’ve gotta do.”

“You are a Guardian, Faith. That is your true calling. No other Slayers will be called. You are Miss Summers’ Guardian. The search has ended.”

“Guardian?” Faith was reeling from the knowledge that she had never been meant to fight vampires, was called for a purpose other than that which had been her life.

“Each entity on Earth has a Guardian. They help to guide the being through life, helping, advising. Like Pinocchio had Jiminy Cricket.” The man smiled at Faith, glad he had conjured an image she could relate to.

“Like a conscience?”

“Not quite. Demons and vampires have Guardians too. They all have a place and purpose in the world.”

“So I’m B’s Guardian. Why me? Why hasn’t she had one for the past 19 plus years?”

“A major event must trigger the Guardian. We assumed that Kendra would be Buffy’s Guardian because of the events surrounding her death. Buffy’s relationship with the vampire, Angel. Sending him to hell was a defining point in her life. When Kendra was not activated as Guardian, another Slayer, you Faith, was sent to protect Miss Summers.”

Faith winced. “I didn’t do a very good job.”

“You did in the end Faith. Now you have been approved as Buffy’s Guardian you must go to her. She will need your help in the coming weeks, as she must face an event more life-changing than sending her lover to everlasting damnation.”

“Can she see me?”

“The Slayer and her friends will be able to see and hear you for the first few weeks only, the energy from the hellmouth will undoubtedly help. Once the event has passed, she will not be able to see you, you will be merely a presence in her mind.”

“You said my life was bound to two people.” Faith was struggling with all of this information.

“The vampire Angel, he holds your heart, does he not?”

Faith blushed.

“If Buffy sets you free, you will be bound to Angel for eternity.”

“As a Guardian?”

“As a ghost.”

Chapter Ten

Xander and Willow approached Buffy’s house slowly. Dawn was just breaking and even though it was only a couple of hours since they had heard the news about Faith, the two friends had been unable to wait too long before going to see Buffy. They walked hand in hand up the porch steps, clinging to each other for comfort. Neither of them had been able to make any sort of peace with Faith, and they hoped Buffy had. They were worried about their friend. Buffy had had a weird and emotional couple of days, and she needed rest.

Willow knocked quietly, not wanting to disturb her best friend if she was asleep. Xander leant against the doorframe, his eyes closed, wishing he’d had one minute to tell Faith that he forgave her. A minute passed and the pair decided that Buffy must be in bed. As they started down the stairs again the door swung open. The two best friends looked at each other and then approached the house warily. No one stood in the doorway.

Willow was the first to realise that Spike must have stayed with Buffy. Her friend’s revelations about the blonde vampire’s feelings had not come as such a great surprise. In fact she had been more shocked that Buffy seemed to be in total ignorance of the fact that the undead Englishman was hopelessly in love with her.

She entered the house resolutely, Xander following nervously behind. She turned towards the living room and saw Spike diligently avoiding the sunlight beaming through the windows. She smiled, reassuring him that she was pleased he was there; glad he was helping her friend.

Xander had no idea about Spike’s feelings for Buffy or her growing feelings in return and was surprised that Spike had stayed to make sure that Buffy was ok. “What are you still doing here? Shouldn’t you have crawled back to your rock by now?”

“Xander!” Willow elbowed her friend in the side. Spike had tried to save Buffy, had saved her for all they knew, so she didn’t think that this was the best time for Xander to become protective and judgemental.

“You know Harris, we’re all having a really bad day, and if you say one more thing I don’t like, I’m going to tear your arms and legs off, pain or no pain.” Spike really wasn’t in the mood for the Whelp’s sarcastic statements. He wished he hadn’t bothered to let them in now. But Buffy would want to see them, and even though he selfishly wanted to keep her to himself, she needed Willow and Xander, and he was not going to get in the way.

“Spike, uh, how’s Buffy?” Willow asked quickly, desperate for them to get back to the reason they were all here. Spike smiled at Willow. He really did like the little Witch, not that he’d ever admit that. “She’s asleep. Exhausted poor thing.”

He didn’t notice how his voice softened when he spoke about Buffy, or how his eyes glazed when he thought of her. Willow was looking for it now, though, and she smiled. Xander wondered what had got into Spike. He wasn’t usually the type to sit with his mortal enemy after a night of combat and make sure that she was sleeping properly. In fact he was surprised that Spike had helped Buffy at all. Didn’t they hate each other? He opened his mouth to ask, but the look Willow shot him, silenced him immediately. Something strange was going on.

“Can we see her?” Willow asked.

“I think you should wait until she wakes up, unless you want to sit with her for a while,” then “one at a time,” he clarified, looking straight at Xander.

****

Buffy woke as Spike rose to answer the door. She was a little surprised to find him still there, watching over her as she slept. She smiled softly as she watched him cross the room through half closed eyes. She was glad he had stayed.

The pleasant thoughts gave way to the horror of the night before as Buffy came fully awake. Faith was dead. Buffy felt a lump form in her throat. “Oh God,” she whispered into her pillow, and started to cry softly.

The flash of light, which filled the room, startled Buffy out of her foetal position on the bed. She looked around her, trying to make out any threat. She couldn’t see anything different.

Then she saw her. Faith; materialising in front of her as if by magic.

“Hey B,” Faith said nervously, as Buffy slid slowly to the floor in a dead faint.

****

Willow looked up at the sound of Buffy hitting the floor and then across at Spike, who was already half way up the stairs. Willow and Xander followed quickly, anxious for their friend.

Spike threw the door to Buffy’s bedroom open and saw her prone body lying next to her bed. In two steps he lifted her into his arms and sat down on the bed, placing her comfortably in his lap. He started to pat her cheek gently, trying to wake her. “Buffy?” he called softly, “Buffy, wake up love.”

Willow and Xander stopped in the doorway, taking in the image of vampire and Slayer. Willow smiled widely as she looked at them. Xander rolled his eyes and scanned the rest of the room. His jaw dropped and he froze as he saw Faith standing by Buffy’s mirror. Willow looked at him curiously and then across at where he was staring. Her eyes widened and she opened her mouth to speak, but she couldn’t.

Buffy blinked sleepily, looked up into the beautiful blue eyes of her mortal enemy, and smiled. “Hey.”

“Hey yourself,” he replied tenderly, smiling down at her. Why did she have to be so damn beautiful? “What happened pet?”

“I think I must have been dreaming. I thought I saw Faith.” Buffy’s eyes filled with tears, and Spike bent down and lovingly kissed her forehead. “Shh,” he soothed, “It’s alright.”

“Buffy?” Xander was the first to regain the use of his vocal chords and called to the Slayer, shocked, as he stared at the dead girl.

Spike took a deep, unnecessary breath and looked at the ceiling, irritated, before moving Buffy off his knees and onto the bed so she could talk to her friends. Buffy smiled slightly at the vampire’s actions and turned to Xander. He and Willow were staring across the room. She turned to follow their gaze and saw Faith.

“Uh, Spike?” she questioned the man sitting next to her. “Is Faith standing over by the mirror?” 

Spike looked quickly at Buffy, the expression on his face clearly stating she’d lost her mind, and then over to the mirror in the corner of the room. When he saw the other Slayer he almost fell off the bed in shock.

“Thanks, it’s nice to know I’m not going crazy,” she told him, her eyes never moving from her friend. “Faith?”

“B. Look I’m sorry I gave you such a fright. They uh, they just sent me down here and I don’t really know what I’m supposed to be doing.” She twisted her pretty face in confusion and the discomfort of the situation. “Xander, Willow,” she had things to say before she started on her new ‘destined path’. Faith rolled her eyes at the thought. ‘Destined path. What’s that supposed to mean? Last one got me killed.’ 

“I’m sorry.”

Willow and Xander came out of their trance like state at her words and smiled. “That’s ok Faith.” Willow was glad she had another chance to talk to the second Slayer. Even if she didn’t understand it. “Yeah, I mean, we’re all friends here.” Xander accepted the situation totally. What else had he come to expect from this town?

****

Drusilla was un-amused. She was chained in Giles’ small bathtub unable to move. She continued to struggle against the chains every once in a while, but her mind was most occupied with ways in which to save herself from the stake she knew Buffy would have waiting for her. Why had she ever thought Riley could help her? “Useless,” she muttered, “Bloody useless.”

Giles entered the bathroom cautiously. He knew that Drusilla had powers he could not control or disarm and he needed to be careful. He had considered letting Tara take the vampiress her ‘meal’, as Tara’s own magical powers would make her less susceptible. However Giles’ never felt comfortable putting the youngsters in danger, even though he knew at this point, they could take care of themselves. He approached the bathtub resolutely; arm outstretched holding the same ‘Kiss the Librarian’ mug they had forced Spike to drink from.

Drusilla wrinkled her nose at the mug, pursing her lips as she wondered what she could do to the Watcher to make him release her. She smiled cruelly as a thought came to her.

Giles saw the smile and closed his eyes. “It won’t work this time, Drusilla. I’m not in such a hopeless state that I’ll believe Jenny’s in front of me. Or anyone else for that matter.” He opened his eyes again and looked warily at her.

Dru stared at Giles, her eyes hypnotising him. “Shh. Mummy’s going to make everything better.”

****

The crash from the bathroom caused the seven inhabitants of the living room to jump violently. Tara looked across at Anya from her position beside Oz on the couch, and the former demon stood quickly and started toward the noise. Angel ran quickly ahead of her through the house, not wanting Dru to hurt anyone more than she had already done. More than they had already done.

A piece of him also reminded himself that he didn’t want Dru killed. He had lost Darla and Faith in one night. Dru was his Childe; he had made her what she was. She was his responsibility.

The bathroom door swung open, and Angel stood in the doorway taking in the scene in front of him. Giles lay unconscious in the bath, while Dru was busy unlocking the shackles that bound her wrists. She smiled sweetly when she saw him. “My Angel. The nasty Watcher was…”

“Enough Dru! You know I’m not letting you leave here,” Angel growled warningly.

“But you can’t stop me Angel, you’ve never been able to stop me.”

“Dru…”

“If he can’t, we can.” Anya appeared in the doorway, aiming a crossbow at the female vampire’s heart; Wesley, Cordelia and Beth stood behind her, each holding stakes.

****

Oz shifted uncomfortably on the couch. His muscles had begun to ache in protest at the strain they had been under for the last few days, and even Willow and Tara’s spells couldn’t completely remove the pain of the bruises Angelus had inflicted. He raised his head slightly and looked at Tara. She had sat nervously next to him since Willow left, trying to ease his pain, fetching him drinks and plumping the pillows. But she was still uncomfortable around him. He could feel it. He needed to reassure her as Willow had, that he was not going to take the redheaded witch away from her.

“You love her?”

“Yeah.”

“Good… Don’t hurt her.”

“No!”

“Excellent.”

“You love her.”

“Yes I do.”

“Then why?”

“Because… She needs you.”

“I need her.”

“I understand.”

“You’re not going to take her.”

“No I’m not.”

“Thanks Oz.”

Oz smiled.

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